As the summer holidays draw to a close, families across the UAE are preparing for the return of early mornings, homework and school runs. For parents with children of different ages, however, getting them ready for the classroom can look very different.
While routines such as sleep schedules and screen time often become part of the preparation, Kavita Srinivasan, a parenting coach, said the most important thing parents can do is listen to how their children actually feel about returning to school.
“If your child says, ‘I don’t want to go back to school, I hate school, it’s so boring,’ just listen to your child,” Srinivasan told Khaleej Times. “Ask them what it is about school they don’t like, what they are looking forward to and what they are not looking forward to.”
She said parents often respond by immediately trying to reassure children that school will be fun or that they will see their friends again, rather than allowing them to express their feelings.
“Our children actually don’t need us to fix things for them or make them feel better,” she said. “They just need someone to listen to them. As long as they feel heard and understood, that’s all it takes.”
When it comes to routines, Srinivasan recommends involving children in the process rather than simply telling them what will change.
“Sit down with your child and come up with their schedule collaboratively,” she said. “Let’s plan the week together, so children don’t feel like they’re being told what to do at all times and they have a say in the process.”
She also warned parents not to dismiss anxiety or reluctance about returning to school, saying it could point to an underlying problem involving a teacher, subject or peer group.
“If a child is anxious or reluctant to return to school, the most important thing is to really open up space for them to tell you why they feel like this,” she said.
For younger children struggling with separation anxiety, she suggested a gradual transition and small reminders of home. With teenagers, who may be less willing to talk openly, she advised parents to watch for changes in behaviour and continue making themselves available.
“The bottom line is we have to always listen to our children and not ignore their complaints or anxiety,” she said.
That preparation can look different from one household to another.
Aisha Obaid starts preparing her children, aged 5, 8 and 9, around two weeks before the new academic year, gradually bringing back their routine while getting practical tasks such as medical checkups and school shopping out of the way.
“We do their checkups, buy their school clothes and start changing their routine,” she said. “It prepares them psychologically because they know school is coming.”
She also spreads the shopping across several days rather than getting everything at once.
“One day we buy clothes, another day we buy notebooks, and another day we buy something else,” she said. “It gets them excited.”
During the summer, Aisha keeps her children practising Arabic, English and mathematics while focusing on areas where each child needs additional support.
“I look at where my child is weak, and that is what I work on during the holiday,” she said, adding that she arranged online Arabic lessons for her daughter and also works with her at home.
To keep the routine from becoming repetitive, she changes the subjects across the week and lets her children make some decisions about their schedules within limits.
She also uses screen time as an incentive for studying.
“You want the iPad, and I want you to study,” she tells them. “Give me what I want, and I’ll give you what you want.”
Umm Al Theeb, a mother of four children aged 5 to 11, takes a different approach. Rather than focusing on restricting devices, she creates activities that make her children want to return to school.
A big part of that is preparing small giveaways her children can take to school and share with their classmates.
“The most important thing for me is the giveaways,” she said. “I feel that this is what gets my children excited.”
Some are connected to what they are learning. If the class is studying a particular letter, she might prepare a small toy linked to a word beginning with it.
“If they are learning the letter L, I’ll give them a little lion because lion starts with L,” she said.
She also prepares gifts for occasions celebrated at school, including Happiness Day, Women’s Day and Heart Day.
“Children like giving gifts to their classmates,” she said. “I do it to encourage them to go to school.”
Some of the preparation begins during the summer, when she starts getting the giveaways ready. Swimming, activities and summer camps also help keep the children occupied ahead of the new term.
But as children grow older, getting them back into school mode can require a different strategy.
Moza Rashed, whose children are aged 10, 13 and 16, has adapted her approach as they have grown.
When her children were younger, Moza made use of summer programmes available across the UAE. One that stood out was a zoo camp.
“The skills they learned there were incredible,” she said. “It wasn’t only information about animals. They did things themselves and worked with their hands.”
Moza said the camps helped keep her children mentally active during the long summer break. Now that they are older, she has replaced them with a simpler habit at home.
“When they were younger, they went to camps,” she said. “Now that they’re older, the reading continues at home.”
Even if it is only one paragraph, Moza makes sure they read every day. She also starts adjusting their sleep routine shortly before the school year begins.
“At least three days before school, we change their sleeping routine,” she said.
During summer, midnight is generally the latest bedtime. As school approaches, she gradually moves it to 11pm, then 10pm before the first day.
The rules around technology also change during the academic year. Devices, including the PlayStation and computer, are switched off around Maghrib, giving the children time to focus on the rest of their evening routine.
The three mothers have adapted their back to school preparations to their children’s ages and personalities, but Srinivasan said one principle should remain the same regardless of age.
“The most important thing is to understand your child, empathise with your child, hold space for your child and not try to fix things,” she said. “Do not deny your child’s experiences.”
Source: Khaleej Times